Thank you for an enchanting time last night, Princess. I think this could be the start of a wonder ful relationship. In fact, I know this’ll be the start of a wonderful relationship. You were amazing in bed. It’s hard to believe it was your first time, as a woman at least. A panter AND a screamer! Who would have thought a heterosexual male could make for such a ravenous, sexy girl? Either you always secretly wanted it, or you REALLY don’t want me to e-mail your boss those pictures of you taking drugs! Now I want you to strut your pretty stuff over to the corner shop and buy everything you’ll need to make me breakfast in bed, sweetheart. No, you can’t have a shower. Yes, I know you’re covered in sweat and tears. No, you can’t brush out your wig. Yes, you will wear the dress from last night – tear or no tear. Grab your purse and go. You’re fine the way you are. You’re my dirty little stop-out, and I want the world to know it.

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